Looking for a Job???

I'm still looking for a job and have had several good interviews. I will hopefully have something within the next week or so and then I'll tell you all about it. However, while I was searching on Craigslist, I came across a post entitled "Pizzetta 211 seeks someone who wants to cook food." I don't know what made me click on it, I knew it was going to be nothing that I could financially consider, but the sheer randomness of "cook food" made me curious. I was totally right!! Below is the post in full. I almost want to work for this person just on how fun they sound to be around!

Not trying to be a wordy asshole but I don't want to waste your or my time. And I apologize in advance for any gramatical errors or anything offensive.

The position I'm looking to fill involves a lot of cooking (potentially involving your very own dishes). So it would be beneficial to me if you are a good cook and have worked in a kitchen before. But not all experience is good and I don't discriminate against amateurs if you can make a convincing argument. More important to me than your ability with food is your dedication and willingness to learn and accept criticism. Beyond cooking you will be expected to do all the duties of a Pizzetta bad ass including making pizzas, baking desserts, doing dishes, dressing salads, waiting on tables, making espresso drinks, mopping the floor and whatever else I tell you to do that's not illegal. We don't exploit marginalized people at Pizzetta so besides all the fun stuff that comes with conceptualizing, cooking and serving food you will be expected to roll up your sleeves and do your own dirty work. You will also be very busy because Pizzetta is usually very busy. You will get to make tips and because of that fact you will probably make better money than most, if not all, line cooks/prep cooks/sous chefs around town (but that shouldn't be your main source of motivation because I HATE mercenaries). You will be treated like family because we are a family, albeit a sometimes dysfunctional one. I'm thinking about 35ish hours a week but nothing is in stone. An ideal applicant is someone who loves food and is hardworking, coachable and fun to be around. Sound good?

DO NOT apply for this job if...

-you think you are a rock star chef and like to do things your own way without learning the basics.
-you are in a band that requires that you miss freaking every other shift so you can go stand in line for a limited addition banjo pick or play at the battle of the bands in freaking Chico.
-if you don't like to be critiqued.
-if you are antisocial, awkward, and cannot deal with the public or your coworkers.
-if you plan on getting a "more" serious job in a month or two.
-if you are a self-entitled brat and think that just doing your freaking job is a huge imposition to you.
-if you can't wake up to be at work by 7am (on some days).
-if you can't work hard for more than 2 hours without taking a break.
-if you can't work on weekends.
-if you plan on going on more than 3ish vacations that are a week or longer throughout the year besides the holidays.
-if you don't have command of the English langauge because you will need to speak and interact with the public.
-if you can't hack it working in a busy and sometimes stressful restaurant.

If this all sounds good BRING your resume and cover letter to Pizzetta sometime Wednesday November 30th between 7am and 10:30pm. Your cover letter will probably determine whether or not you get an interview and should address why you would like this job and why I might actually want you at Pizzetta. DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT email me your resume and cover letter because I will not read it and I gurantee that you won't get the job. If you cannot make it in person Wednesday because you're on a 3 day mushroom trip in Joshua Tree or off fighting against Japanese whalers have your roommate/mom/friend drop it off for you. If you have any legitimate questions (besides "where are you" because if you can't find Pizzetta 211 in this day and age I don't want you working for me) please ask via email and if I'm slow to respond it's because I'm too busy wading through the morons who are undoubtably emailing me their resumes. I WILL get back to you though. That's it. All the best.

Awesome!!!